Life

Am I Attractive Enough to Run for Political Office?

April 9, 2013

Perhaps by this post’s end, the answer to my question, “Am I good-looking enough to run for a political office?” will find an answer.  You see, I’m mightily confused about appearance, political office and political correctness. A confluence of events and random conversations pushed this question to the front.  In one news thread, Hillary Clinton’s political future rivals her hair for headlines; another thread chats up President Obama’s complimentary quip about California’s female attorney general; pundits chat about other possible 2016 presidential […]

If I Were Gay, Would I Be Equal To Others?

March 26, 2013

I’ve been thinking about being gay. I’ve been thinking about what if the absolute love of my life was a woman. I’ve been thinking about gay/lesbian couples I know that honor each other and their children. Then I thought about how same-sex life-partners share the same care, anger, drama, joy, and tragedy that Mr. and Mrs. Bob and Mary Doe share. This is not my outing. I am straight, but what if I was lesbian and my partner was Jane not Clif? […]

Guns and Lilies

March 11, 2013

A rambunctious passion fruit vine overcompensates itself in a portion of my garden.  A few under planted white calla lilies collide with the ravenous vine.  But the lily’s determination to break through the thick vine succeeds and an over-sized lily blossoms thru the vine—creating  a stunning garden contrast—and victory over the dominate vine. The recent arguments and defensive mechanisms by the gun industry is much like my overcompensating passion fruit vine.  Through its root, the National Rifle Association, an intertwined, over-fertilized pattern […]

Questing Compassionate Love

February 13, 2013

When you visit my home, a bronze Quan Yin sits in her meditative pose atop a lotus flower. Her eyes are downcast; her right hand evokes attention or mindfulness, while her left hand rests on her knees and holds a vase of water. This goddess of compassion dominates my living area. A guest room is devoted to this bodhisattva, as is a portion of the garden outside of that room. Why the multiple effigies of Quan Yin?  She is both the  “ […]

Hoping New BlackBerry Q10 is Purple

January 31, 2013

When I finally stepped up the cell phone ladder to my lavender BlackBerry I realized that I had wasted too many years with a plain old cell phone.  However, over the last few years  I covertly used my BlackBerry in public.  I didn’t want to look like some stubborn, technology-ignorant senior citizen.   Wait! I must reclaim that comment as I flashback to my bestie, EP (a cool guy in his 80s), when we had a lunch date and he stood in front […]

Ice Age of Emotions on a Warming Planet

January 14, 2013

As seen in New Times SLO Once again this nation has discharged the looney-tunes world of uncompromising gun ownership. Meanwhile, the planet no longer politely speaks and now hands us looney-tune climate conditions.  Rude is rampant. Gun fanatics scream while Mother Earth kicks us like an old tin can.  I’m feeling like I might want to resurrect one of those bomb shelters from the early 1960s. I thought correlating guns and climate change was clever and original until I searched and found […]

Pressure Cooking: Duck and Cover or Relax?

January 5, 2013

1956: Blub, blub, blub. Wheeze, whistle, spit. KABOOM! A silver lid with an attached gauge becomes a projectile and looks like a flying saucer shooting forth from its aluminum pot base. Scalding hot water takes to the air.  Someone screams, “Oh, my God,” in the background, followed by a 3-pound beef brisket that explodes like the A-bomb tests out in the Nevada desert. A mushroom cloud of brown meat rises above the white Westinghouse range.  Shrapnel-like bits of beef plaster themselves to […]

“Thank You” — The Art of Re-gifting

December 26, 2012

After a second helping of the Christmas dinner lasagna, I felt as round as the blow-up snowman on our deck that stoically waves to passersby.  I adjusted my stuffed body on the couch and grumbled, “I designate 2012 as the year of not saying Thank You.” Now, I know I’m not an etiquette queen, but jeeze, do folks no longer find it necessary to simply utter “thank you” once in a while?  Are thank you notes a thing of the past?  Heck, […]

ULTIMATE Life Goal Answer Keeps Me Bare-Skinned

November 30, 2012

Today I heard the best security question ever.  But, first, a quick back story. In 2009 I took out a secured loan.  A small balance remained.  Presently, I’m near the end of standing naked in an allegorical spread-sheet format before bankers, credit companies, loan specialists, underwriters, and other such entities in the mortgage refinance business. “The underwriters would like you to pay off that 2009 secured loan,” noted one of the above persons.  “Please show the account that you used to pay […]